Old quote 1:

He goes on to say, “And one of them came to me the next morning and he said, “You know, I’ve never listened to classical music in my life, but when you played that shopping piece … He said, “My brother was shot last year and I didn’t cry for him. But last night, when you played that piece, he was the one I was thinking about. And I felt the tears streaming down my face. And it felt really good to cry for my brother.” So I made up my mind at that moment that classical music is for everybody. Everybody.” 

New Quote 1:

He goes on to say that the morning after he had performed the piece for the children, one of them came up to him and said  “You know, I’ve never listened to classical music in my life, but when you played that shopping piece … He said, “My brother was shot last year and I didn’t cry for him. But last night, when you played that piece, he was the one I was thinking about. And I felt the tears streaming down my face. And it felt really good to cry for my brother.” Zander said he knew that after that moment classical music was for everybody.

Old Quote 2:

By definition to be an “altruist” is to be “unselfishly concerned for or devoted to the welfare of others (opposed to egoistic).” 

New Quote 2:

To be an altruist is to be, put into literal terms, “devoted to the welfare of others.”

I believe these quotes worked better after being revised because they fit better into the context of my argument as opposed to what they were before. I think before revising they were too long of a quote and didn’t make sense in my text.