Month: September 2018

I actually really liked this short excerpt of her view on how we all write shitty first drafts and how no one just sits down and writes a perfect paper their first go. I definitely agree that my first draft was not my best work and most certainly not a finished product, but a good base for a paper that could turn out amazing
(hopefully). I loved how she said that few writers actually know what they are doing until it has been done. That’s how I feel when I am writing in that it feels like you are just writing words on a page until you look back over what you have done and read the finished product. I can also relate to the fact that she said she would just start writing a page long paragraph, which is what I can tend to do, and how she would clean it up from there so it’s nice to know that I’m not the only one who does that!

Revision Plan Strategy:

1. My goal for my paper at this point is to finetune any details and shorten the lengths of my paragraphs. I will also strive to use more examples and quotes from the EA’s and Southan to strengthen my argument.
2. I first plan to shorten my paragraphs into sections of relevance to the argument, add supporting evidence and arguments into places that are needed, rearrange my paragraphs so they structurally make sense, and fix any grammatical errors and improper tone of voice.
3. I see my biggest challenge being the structure of the paper and where to place what information where so that I can make my argument understandable and clear.
4. If something becomes too difficult for me to figure out I will look to my peer review notes for guidance and clarity, and I also have the Little Seagull handbook which contains tons of information on how to strengthen an argument and how to structure a paper.

From doing this first session of peer review, I learned that there are many different things you see when carefully reading an essay. The peer review can help you see what is flawed in your own works when reading the work of others, for example, where you may need to add in arguments, information, or ideas. 

I wholeheartedly do not believe that any art is a waste of time no matter music, painting, filmmaking, all of it is useful and impactful. I know the EA’s just want to do good and help out people in need around the world, but they go about it in such a way that really turns me off. I just can’t justify the fact that they think that everyone is replaceable and their work doesn’t matter because everyone is so different and unique that it all matters to someone. I personally feel such a strong connection with music and if I was never able to experience what I have listening to music I think my life would be very different. As a kid, my dad would always play his oldies music for us and that really spoke to me and I’ve fallen in love with it and have been listening to it ever since. I don’t think that something that can bring people such joy in life can be a “waste of time,” as the EA’s would think.

The speaker of my choice TED talk, Benjamin Zander, does not believe that there are any limits to the power and effect that classical music has on people. He discusses how there are not many people in the world who listen to classical music at all which I guess you could say is a limit of sorts, but not a limit to how powerfully the music can affect you when listening to it. Zander believes it can touch anyone and everyone all around the world. I too believe that not just classical music but music, in general, can transform peoples outlooks on the world. Classical music is so beautiful and moving and can make you ponder things you may not consciously think of every day. Like Zander says in his TED talk, a little boy’s brother was murdered and he didn’t cry for him, but when he heard Chopin’s piece he felt the tears flowing down his face. When I heard the piece he played, I personally thought of my family pet of 16 years that we had to put down earlier this year. I reflected on the good times we spent together and it made me happy, reminiscent, and teary-eyed as the beautiful melody continued on. The power that that classical piece had on not only me but everyone in the TED talk audience who listened to it, was so moving and amazing.

Another power to this art form that stood out to me as amazingly significant was the fact that Zander said in his talk that, “If their eyes are shining, you know you’re doing it.” This was just significant and moving to me because it really is so true. I know that feeling when you are specifically moved by something or someone and you can just feel yourself light up. Zander says that everyone has shining eyes in the audience after Chopin’s piece is played and that’s how he knows as a musician and conductor he is impacting the audience. The fact that he could even reach an audience of 7th graders and have them attentive and listening to this classical piece is so telling of the power of this type of music. I think it really gets you to think and interpret what you relate the piece to, and that’s what makes it so unique and powerful.

When I read and annotated Southan’s text for the second time I realized so many different things that I didn’t catch the first time reading the essay. I noticed many more significant quotes and many of the EA’s ideas and thoughts came to light in the text. The first time around, the essay was slightly confusing and I didn’t quite catch onto the EA’s thinking and ideas. Going back a second time, there were many parts of the essay that made much more sense to me, especially at the beginning of the essay where he is first discussing EA’s and their mission. It is a little confusing when you read it the first time, but the second time around you start to notice how the beginning ties into the whole essay. Reading this essay for the second time also made me realize how radical and unethical the EA’s really are, and how much I do not care for their organization or the message that they send. I picked up on so many more of the EA’s quotes and ideas about how they view art. What also majorly aided in my successful reading of this essay was being able to look up a couple words that I was unsure about. Having looked them up using the dictionary on my phone I was better able to understand what they meant, and the concepts and thoughts of the author and EA’s.

To elaborate on the point of being “replaceable,” as EA’s would say, I do not agree with what they think at all. They believe that if, as an artist, if you are just as good as the person next to you than what point is there in doing it. If you want to be successful you need to make yourself irreplaceable and always strive and need to be better than the next person. In short, they’re mostly saying that if you’re not always doing better than someone else that you don’t matter, or that your work doesn’t matter. This is just completely absurd to me that someone preaching “good deeds” would degrade people in such a way as this. Saying that your work doesn’t matter unless your doing better than the next person infuriates me. If that was really the case, there wouldn’t be any current, famous pop singers because, in my opinion, all their work sounds pretty similar, but each song has their own unique spin on it. Everyone’s work is important to them and society in different ways so to try and discredit that is totally not acceptable in my book.

It is also very ironic how hypocritical the EA’s can be in their preachings. They like to say how art is a waste of time and you should be helping the poor instead of “watching the world burn” while you paint, or draw, or write, etc. On the other hand, they say that you can make art as long as it pertains to the EA’s ideas and morals. I don’t understand how that is right to be able to tell people what they can and can’t express in their personal artistic interpretations.  They are basically stating that art is bad unless you’re using it to promote their group. How they gain followers using this methodology is pretty surprising to me honestly. That would be like telling someone to ask before they take something from you, then proceeding to take something from them without asking. It is just very unethical and wrong to be so hypocritical like that.